Great Moments In Horror Hair History: Taryn’s Mohawk From ‘A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors’ (1987)

Quick confession:  I had a major crush on Taryn from A Nightmare On Elm Street: Dream Warrior back in 1987.  I’m sure I wasn’t alone, but it was mostly due to her on-screen transformation from ‘Regular Tayrn’ into ‘Badass Sexy Knife-Wielding Mohawk Taryn’.

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The knives do look a little wimpy, but feast your eyes on that damn mohawk! Nothing can upstage some leather studs and wimpy knives more than an 8-inch hair erection.  When Taryn wasn’t abusing drugs, she was playing fantasy time with the other Dream Warriors and proclaiming that in her dreams, she’s beautiful……and bad!

Unfortunately for Taryn, she wasn’t bad enough and was no match for Freddy and his syringe fingers.  Maybe she should have worried more about her knife skills instead of asking him to dance.  At least it allowed Freddy to get a good one-liner in at the end of her death scene.  Nevertheless, we’re honoring Taryn’s mohawk and because of that, she’s been enshrined into the class of Great Moments In Horror Hair History!  Now let’s celebrate her achievement by watching her onscreen demise:

So, About This ‘Martyrs’ Remake…….

I haven’t went on a good rant in a while.  And what better place to start it back up than with this upcoming remake of the amazing 2008 French horror movie, Martyrs.

I’ll save my breath about Hollywood and the fact that they can’t come up with any original ideas anymore for horror movies, let alone movies in general.  The soon-to-be released Poltergeist remake looks pretty much like a CGI-infused carbon copy of the original.  And don’t get me started on this “exact script as the original” version for the Cabin Fever that’s going to be forced upon us soon.  But none gets my blood boiling more than the upcoming remake of Martyrs, a truly original and mesmerizing horror masterpiece in my opinion that not only punches you in the gut while you watch it, but makes you contemplate something as important and thought provoking as afterlife.  Oh, and it’s got one amazing shotgun blast death scene too.

Tremendous, isn’t it?  If you’ve seen the original Martrys, then I don’t have to tell you it goes to places that most American films don’t have the balls to go to. And therein lies the problem with this remake.  I just don’t have an ounce of faith that it will take you to where the original went and make you feel what the original made you feel in the end.  Martyrs was one of the only horror movies that literally made me sit in silence after I watched it for a good 15 minutes or so.  But who knows….maybe the directing duo of The Goetz Brothers (there are two of them, so maybe that’s an advantage) will prove me wrong and deliver something faithful and honorable to that 2008 version.  At least they’re not overselling it already and calling it ‘The Ultimate Horror Movie‘ or anything like that.

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Fuck……

It’s Random ‘Behind-The-Scenes’ Pic Time!

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The poor bastard whose head explodes in Scanners posing with his stunt doubles (1981)

Great Moments In Jump Scare History: ‘Window Demon’ From ‘Drag Me To Hell’ (2009)

I always seem to forget about Drag Me To Hell.  And every time that I do remember it, another scene pops into my head.  Sorry to say that it isn’t the scene where the toothless gypsy woman gnaws on Christine’s face in the parking garage.  It’s all about jump scares this time, and Drag Me To Hell has one of the best jump scares of all time in the scene below.  There’s even a precursor jump scare to the main jump scare to warm you up a little bit.

I think the reason that the ‘Window Demon’ jump scare works so well is because there is already a sense of chaos established after Christine sees the shadow come under the door.  Things are already ramping up, so when the jump scare happens, it’s effective and mostly because of the intense sound design of the demon’s voice.  If you didn’t jump at all at that moment in the scene, then congratulations to you for being better than everyone else who did jump!  There’s a cake coming in your honor and maybe a stripper too.  I’m writing with sarcasm by the way, so you can’t hold me to those promises.

Exclusive 30th Anniversary ‘Demons’ Soundtrack On Vinyl And CD!

Lamberto Bava and Dario Argento’s 1985 Italian horror classic, Demons, is about to turn 30 years old!  And that makes me feel equally as old!  But enough about my age insecurities, let’s talk about the awesome releases that Rustblade.Com has coming to celebrate the birthday.  Over at their website, you can pre-order a few limited edition releases:

Limited edition ‘Demons’ bag (only 100 made) including:  Blue transparent vinyl release (limited to 666 copies), Tin box with CD and bonus CD (limited to 299), Transparent postcard, Metropol movie ticket, Autographed poster from composer Claudio Simonetti, Embroidery patch, and more!

The vinyl and CD versions are also sold separately (and come with non-autographed posters), but the are limited to the number given above. 

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Being the horror vinyl collector that I am, I already snagged two copies and as of the writing of this post, there were only about 65 copies left out of the 666 total amount for the vinyl.  Head on over to Rustblade.Com and pick up yours today.  Be aware though that this is the Claudio Simonetti composed soundtrack and does not contain the heavy metal tracks (Billy Idol, Motley Crue, etc) from the movie that are available on the original soundtrack release. Still awesome though, so celebrate the Demons 30th Anniversary and break out your best Tony The Pimp impressions while you do!

Give Me The Creeps: The Food Of The Gods (1976)

I grew up with a pretty extreme fear of giant rats and chickens.  Clearly that sounds ridiculous, but try telling that to a 7-year-old boy who watched 1976′s The Food Of The Gods on public television one Saturday afternoon.    Continue reading

Sunday Bloody Sunday: ‘Death By Ruler’ From ‘Child’s Play 2′ (1990)

I’m up at midnight looking up clips of a redheaded homicidal possessed doll beating a teacher with a yardstick ruler.  Yeah, I should probably go to bed.  But before I do, let’s talk about Chucky!

On this week’s Sunday Bloody Sunday, I’m going back almost 25 years….Holy shit – 25 years?  Seriously???  Now I’m depressed AND sleep deprived.  Anyway, I’m going back almost 25 years to 1990 when Child’s Play 2 was released.  And probably the most iconic scene in the movie is when Chucky serves up some actual well deserved justice by way of a large ruler to Andy’s teacher, Miss Kettlewell.  Not sure she deserved to die, but she definitely deserved a few swats from the Chuckster.  Let’s watch and enjoy!

Ebay Find Of The Week: Eli Roth Torso Prop From ‘Piranha 3D’ (2010)

2010′s Piranha 3D had a lot of things:  Boobs.  Boobs.  Boobs.  Sorry, I got sidetracked on the boobs from the movie.  Of course there were other things going on besides real and fake breasts, and one of those things was the exceptional death of director Eli Roth (who was playing a wet T-shirt contest MC) by speedboat:

Tremendous.  So imagine my surprise when I was browsing around Ebay today and actually found someone selling an Eli Roth torso prop from the movie that was supposedly used in that scene.  Yes, it’s my duty to inform some of you out there in Movieland that Eli’s real head did not actually explode on impact from the boat.  They used a prop, and below is a pic of it and what the seller is offering on Ebay.

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Sweet Jesus, that’s pretty creepy.  Good job on the chest hair though as it seems pretty accurate compared to the real Eli Roth.  Unfortunately if you want this rare prop, it’s going to cost you at least $1000.  But the seller is accepting offers, so that’s always a plus.  Head on over to the listing HERE and take a look at more pics and a better description of what this actually is.  There is no COA proof, but if you look at it – how the hell could it not not be real?  Unless someone just has a strange infatuation with Eli Roth and likes making lifelike props of him.  It could happen.

Anticipation Alert: We Are Still Here (2015)

2015 is looking like it might be shaping up as a good year for horror movies.  I don’t want to jinx it, but I’m pretty optimistic.  I’m waiting on pins and needles for It Follows to come out next month, and this teaser for We Are Still Here just got me tingling.

Barbara Crampton?  Lisa Marie?  Weird demon looking things?  I’m there!  I love the teaser because it leaves a lot to the imagination and unless you look up the premise (revolving around a creepy house that awakens every 30 years demanding a sacrifice), you wouldn’t really know what the movie is about.  And I love that.  I noticed the other week some early word leaked online about We Are Still Here, and the early word is good.  Apparently the practical effects, that director Ted Geoghegan is known for from his previous films, are a stand-out and it’s supposedly a genuinely scary horror flick.  No official word on a release date yet, but it will premiere at SXSW in March.  

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Review: The Voices (2015)

Everyone hears voices in their head every now and then.  I’m hearing one right now telling me to go get a breakfast burrito, but I’m going to ignore it and keep writing this review.  Unfortunately for actor Ryan Reynolds in the new horror/comedy The Voices, he hears a lot of them and mostly from his pets who appear to be able to physically talk and trade insults with each other as well.  Oh – and some of them also encourage him to murder people.  Looks like my voice telling me to grab a delicious Mexican breakfast treat isn’t so bad after all.   Continue reading