The Most Sensitive Murderous Demon Ever: Rawhead Rex (1986)

I always felt like Rawhead Rex should have had his own theme song.  Perhaps a bouncy jingle that mentions how he enjoys baptizing priests with his urine, or maybe it could focus on what a misunderstood nice guy he is!  Case in point – this emotional scene where he realizes that killing a pregnant woman does more harm than good.  Get your tissues ready……

What a sensitive murderous demon.  You could tell that he just wanted to rip that fetus right out and perform some kind of amazing juggling act with it, but he didn’t.  His emotions took over and Rawhead Rex realized that he does indeed have a line that he won’t cross.  It was moving.  It was tear-jerking.  And it almost made you forget that he pissed all over that priest.  Almost.

Sunday Bloody Sunday: ‘Carmen’s Transformation’ From ‘Demons’ (1985)

If there was a Hall Of Fame for demon transformations, then Carmen from 1985′s Italian gore-galore classic Demons would have been inducted a looooong time ago.

So, on this week’s Sunday Bloody Sunday it’s a must that I pay homage to Carmen’s transformation and I’m even going to throw in a spiffy throat ripping at the end as a bonus!   When it comes to my love for Demons, there are many highlights (samurai sword demon killing on a motorcycle, anybody?) but I have to tip my cap to the glorious practical effects on display in this particular scene courtesy of the great Sergio Stivaletti.  Watch and learn youngsters, and please enjoy that lovely demon tongue of Carmen’s as well……..

Ebay Find Of The Week: ‘Jack Frost’ Latex Mask

I know that Halloween is coming up soon, and Christmas won’t be far behind it. So why not purchase something that combines the two in glorious hand painted latex fashion?  Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you – the Jack Frost snowman mask!

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If you’ve seen the wonderful 1997 straight-to-video crapfest that is Jack Frost, then you know that the mask above bears an unmistakeable likeness to our favorite homicidal snowman.  So if you were to buy this off of Ebay, you could be the hit of your holiday party this year!  Just make sure you don’t go dipping your carrot anywhere it’s not wanted.  Believe it or not, at $80 a pop – there have already been four of these masks sold and only two are left.  So head on over HERE and grab yours before they’re gone.  And if you need any inspiration to assist you with your purchase, then by all means click on the link below:

Holy Shit Horror: Natalie Cuts Off Her Arm (Evil Dead – 2013)

Thanksgiving is only three months away!  So it’s time to get your electric turkey carver ready to slice through that delicious succulent bird.  But wait – maybe you should practice first just to make sure your skills are up to par so you don’t embarrass yourself in front of your family when you start cutting.  And what better way to practice than on a demonically possessed arm?  Right, Natalie from the 2013 Evil Dead remake?

Yeeesh.  That was realistically gruesome.  There were a lot of moments in the Evil Dead remake that made me say “Holy Shit!“, and this was definitely one of them.  Natalie was pretty defiant of cellar dwelling possessed Mia and just kept cutting and cutting that arm until it eventually fell off.  Mission accomplished, Natalie!  Except it really wasn’t, and you still turned into a demon and died a horrible death.  Gotta love her gusto though and she gets kudos for giving it the old college try!

Lets Have Another Staring Contest…….

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You win easily!!!!  Mostly because Angela isn’t even looking at you to begin with because she’s more preoccupied with having just decapitated someone, not to mention her penis is showing.  Good job!

Dirty Horror Memory Lane: ‘Chiller’ Video Game (1986)

Boy am I a sucker.  While I was slaving away at playing The Legend Of Zelda in 1986 as a 10-year-old kid, I could have been playing this:

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Yes.  That’s an actual screenshot of a video game that came out in 1986 called Chiller.  Granted, this was not really an easy game to find, especially in North America, but it originated as a stand-up arcade game with a light gun that you used to apparently shoot and torture half-naked people. Really makes the story of Link and his quest to find the eight fragments of the Triforce Of Wisdom to rescue Princess Zelda look pretty fucking boring, doesn’t it?

Chiller wasn’t all about shooting mutilated bodies though, as you could also take out bats, wolves, and spooky skulls with your trusty light gun.  It’s good to balance everything out.  There was actually a playable Nintendo version of the game that was released in 1990 with the gore and naked bodies toned down of course to comply with the wholesome image Nintendo was trying to portray at the time.  If you own a copy of the NES version, you’re sitting on a $75-$200 gold mine by the way.  The mere fact that Chiller was originally released in 1986 with that kind of gory content is still pretty remarkable.  Check out the footage for yourself and head on over to Ebay to do some bargain hunting for a copy when you’re done:

Creepiest Pizza Cutter Ever: Don’t Go To Sleep (1982)

Machetes and butcher knives are for suckers.  Yeah, I’m looking at you Jason Voorhees.  Try using a pizza cutter to intimidate someone and then we’ll talk. While I was going through my often cluttered mind of horror movie memories, I remembered a made-for-TV movie called Don’t Go To Sleep from 1982. And one of the scenes that stuck with me was when Mary (Robin Ignico) is stalking her mother (played by Valerie Harper) with a pizza cutter towards the end of the movie.  Check out the clip below and marvel at the sight of a made-for-TV movie that is creepier than pretty much any horror movie released in theaters today.

Sunday Bloody Sunday: Deaths From ‘Hatchet’ (2006)

What better way to spend a Sunday afternoon than by watching the death scenes from Adam Green’s 2006 splatter opus Hatchet?

Yes, on this week’s Sunday Bloody Sunday I’m going all Victor Crowley on your ass with his personal highlight reel from the ‘ode to old school horror’ movie, Hatchet.  You have to just step back and appreciate and respect the sheer brutality and practical effect goodness of this one and realize that when Hatchet was released, it was a breath of fresh horror air.  The sequels weren’t quite up to par for me, but overall Victor Crowley was and is a great addition to the horror villain family.  Now click play below and enjoy the messy madness!

Jack’s Attic Releasing ‘Dead Charlotte’ Resin Figure On 8/21!

I’ve written about Jack’s Attic before when he released the Friday The 13th NES Resin Figure a few months back.  I was lucky enough to snag one of those (only 20 were made) and now he’s back with another great release coming on 8/21!

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That beautiful skeleton in the little dress is none other than Dead Charlotte. And on 8/21 at 12:30 PM EST, she can be yours!  The run will be limited to 50, so your chances are pretty good to grab one before they are gone for good. But, there will be a very limited run of 10 that includes a glow-in-the-dark variant as well and I’m guessing those will be gone in seconds.  Not sure how much the variant will set you back, but the regular version is only $8!  Stay tuned to the Jack’s Attic page HERE and mark your calendars for 8/21 at 12:30 PM EST!

Anticipation Alert: Bite (2015)

If barf bags are involved in the screening of a horror movie, you know that can only be a good sign.  Trust me, I’m not a vomit fiend or anything like that at all – but there’s something “special” about getting handed a barf bag before viewing time.  Publicity stunt?  Maybe.  Over-the-top promotional gag?  Most definitely.  But when you see the trailer for the new gooey insect horror flick called Bite, you might understand the marketing ploy:

I can admit that I’ve always had a fear of getting bitten by an insect and having it’s eggs be laid inside the wound and inside me.  I still get creeped out by the spider scene from the movie The Believers.  So naturally when I watched the trailer for Bite, I got the willies.  Overall, it seems it won’t win any major points for originality as it looks to heavily borrow from David Cronenberg’s version of The Fly.  Not that that’s a bad thing mind you, but we’ve kind of seen the whole ‘person transforms into an insect’ done before.  I’m looking at you Ticks.  But it’s hard to argue with the fact that Bite is already being praised for using grotesque gooey practical effects to enhance the infected girl’s transformation after she’s bitten on a Bachelorette retreat.

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Yes, we’ve talked barf bags – but what about the news that people were fainting and actually vomiting after watching Bite on the big screen during the Fantasia Film Festival?  I actually do believe it, and hopefully I’m not getting roped into some devious and elaborate marketing scheme that will make me wake up one morning with egg on my face.  I do love eggs, but not enough to be humiliated.  I would assume that Bite will be making more festival rounds, especially after the buzz it’s generating (positive reviews are coming in as I type this) and considering that Halloween is coming up soon as well.  Stay tuned for more info and keep the Pepto-Bismol close by!