With another year coming to an anti-climatic close, it’s time for me to reflect on the things that I’m thankful for in the horror world. Let’s all hold hands and bow our heads and get into the thanking! Continue reading
It can’t be argued too much that Madman Marz is the red-headed stepchild horror villain from 80′s slasher movies. Some of you may be reading this and not even know who Madman Marz is. For shame! Because in my opinion, the 1982 extra cheesy slasher film Madman defined what 80′s horror movies were all about back then, and deserves more recognition.
So, on this week’s Sunday Bloody Sunday I’m giving it some of that recognition! Oh, I could go on and on about the amazingly bad hot tub scene that’s in the movie (of which you can see HERE), but I would much rather focus on the death scenes. Did I also mention that Madman has some of the BEST sound effects and music ever? Gaze upon the carnage below to hear for yourself, and look out for my favorite at #9 in the clip. How the Academy overlooked her performance at the Oscars that year is a travesty.
Ooooh…..a tricky one. See – Betty has needles piercing into her eyelids, so for her to blink is going to be extremely rare. Unless of course she enjoys terrible pain in her eyelids, which could be the case – you never know. Stay strong and keep focused! Oh fuck it….who are we kidding. You can’t beat someone in a staring contest with needles stuck in their eyelids. You lose!!
You know the moment. You’re in a wheelchair and about to get lucky in an 80′s horror movie, when all of a sudden instead of climaxing with a hot girl – you’re rolling down the stairs with a machete stuck in your head. It can be a cruel, cruel world and Mark from Friday The 13th Part 2 found that out the hard way unfortunately.
Mark is the guy in the horror movie that you want to root for. He’s nice. He has a disability that doesn’t deter him. And he’s about to make whoopee with Vickie which makes you want to root for him even more. Now if you know the horror rules, you don’t have sex in a horror movie because you’re probably going to die. But Mark didn’t even get to have sex! Oh the horror! It was terrible. It was unthinkable. It was downright mean. So let’s watch it and enjoy his pre-sex demise!!
Shhhhh…..it’s a secret! Well not really, since I was able to find out about it on the internet. But yes, I came across a website for the Super Secret Fun Club, which seems to specialize in creating limited toys and figures based on memories from your TV and movie childhood. One of the reasons I’m spotlighting the Super Secret Fun Club on my site is because they seem to have a love for horror and sci-fi movies. Case in point? This ‘Kuato’ Total Recall figure in the guise of a M.U.S.C.L.E. toy figure from the 80′s:
Any Total Recall or forgotten 80′s toy fan would want that! Unfortunately it’s sold out now, so tough luck. But I have good news! There will be more released soon including one for the three-boobed chick from Total Recall, Large Marge from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure, and even blobby Paul from The Blob remake! Stay tuned to the Super Secret Fun Club Instagram page for more details and announcements and feel free to browse their store page HERE to see what’s available now.
Somewhere, Candyman is sulking…..possibly even drowning his sorrows in a delicious bottle of Mad Dog 20/20 as he reminisces about the good ol’ days when he actually could have had a successful horror movie franchise. He was a great character. He had a menacing deep (but oh so soothing) voice. He also had a pretty great backstory. And then in 1999, Candyman 3: Day Of The Dead happened and he disappeared like a fart in the wind. But let’s not dwell on the bad times, let’s focus on the good times we had with Candyman!
On this week’s Sunday Bloody Sunday, we’re going back to my high school graduation year of 1995 for a little Candyman: Farewell To The Flesh action. Now overall, I sort of dug this sequel and it had a few pretty memorable scenes. One of them being when Candyman wants to party with Annie in her home and her husband Paul decides he wants in on the fun too! Only problem is that when Candyman parties, he likes to gut people. Sorry, Paul.
Good thing I’m in the market for a new overpriced 80′s horror movie keychain! Upon searching for keychains on Ebay for some reason, I stumbled upon something so rare…..so special…..so unnecessary…..that I just had to share the good news with you. Brace yourselves as you gaze upon this promotional keychain from the 1987 horror/comedy, House II: The Second Story!
Oh it’s beautiful, and I’m actually having trouble finding the words to describe such a remarkable specimen. And it’s even better if you like the color yellow! Now for those who don’t know, House II: The Second Story was a sequel to the entertaining first movie in 1986 called House. Personally, I didn’t really like the sequel, but I’m sure there are fans out there who will clamor towards this keychain. But (and it’s a big but), it’s going for $25 on Ebay right now. There is the option to ‘Make An Offer’, so you have that going for you. Head on over to the listing HERE and take a look. I’ll stand back cautiously while the stampede settles down to claim this one……
Well, I took about a week’s hiatus from writing and decided to come back with a ridiculous post about horror movie posters that have my first name on them. Nothing but the best bottom-of-the-barrel writing here, folks! Oh, but it’s not just any movie or movie poster that I’m talking about. It’s none other than the 1983 British alien horror movie Xtro!!!!
See, my name is Tony. And in the poster up there, in case you couldn’t see the large font, it says “When Tony grows up, he’s going to be just like Daddy!“. So naturally when I was younger and saw this, I got excited since me and the kid in the movie apparently had the same name. And then I watched the movie and was less excited. Actually, I take that back. Xtro is pure entertaining horror movie trash and it should be praised for that.
Do you want to see an alien rape a woman? Xtro has you covered! Want to see a woman give birth to a full-grown alien man? Xtro has that too! In fact, the more that I think about it, Xtro has everything you could possibly want in an 80′s horror movie! Including my name as a character in the movie and on the poster like I’ve already mentioned a few times. Now I know what you’re thinking……How does a woman give birth to a full-grown man? I wouldn’t leave you hanging with that inquisition, so check out the clip below to see!
Alright kids….Halloween is only a week and a half away! So quit procrastinating about what you want to be this year, when the answer is clearly a bad representation of Michael Myers. That’s right – another year and another batch of bad Michael Myers Halloween masks have hit online. Don’t believe me? Well then let’s take a look, shall we? Continue reading
Dang. I didn’t get a chance to go to Universal Studios in Japan this year. Not that I was really planning on it, but after seeing this little horror nugget that they’re selling exclusively over there, it felt like the right thing to say. Feast your eyes on the Hello Kitty/Chucky hybrid vinyl figure!
How adorable! Fun for all ages I’m sure. I do have to admit that I kind of want one, and I’m not too confident that Universal Studios in Hollywood is going to be getting them anytime soon. So what does that mean? You go to Ebay and pay 5 times the price of course! Just know that this figure is pretty small, so try not to shell out too much dough for it. To ship from Japan, I would say $40-60 total is a decent price. You can get one for $54 right HERE that includes shipping. Domo Ariagto!