Here we go.  The Halloween movie that everyone either loves or loves to hate. Halloween III:  Season Of The Witch came out in 1982, but with one small omission. There was no Michael Myers.  What?!!  Blasphemy!!  That’s right kids, no Michael Myers.  Instead, he would be replaced by an evil mastermind of a Halloween mask company called Silver Shamrock who planned on killing millions of kids on Halloween night by placing pieces of a stolen Stonehenge boulder into their Halloween masks! This stuff just writes itself.  Panned by critics as well as fueling outrage from the faithful Halloween moviegoers, this entry into the franchise did poorly at the box office, but slowly started to develop a much deserved cult following.

*jazz hands!*

Yes, I am on the one side of the electric fence that feels that this movie is a guilty pleasure, especially around Halloween time and I’ll gladly burn at the stake for thinking that.  

As I’ve noted before, I’m a lover of the cheesy horror movies, but only if they deliver the goods.  Bad plot?  Check.  Enjoyable violence?  Check.  John Carpenter music? Check.  Tom Atkins and his moustache?  Double check. Wanting to give their version of a “Twilight Zone/Invasion Of The Body Snatchers” scenario, producers John Carpenter and Debra Hill agreed to be a part this third entry, but only if Michael Myers got the axe and the ridiculous evil corporate madman got the green light.  Luckily for campy horror fans, the latter happened!

*check out this new teeth whitening technique!*

In addition to all of the above mentioned awesomeness, it has to be noted that Halloween III was incredibly mean spirited towards children.  And since we’re dealing with a movie and not real life, I can say that it only added to the ridiculousness and awesomeness!  The scene where little Johnny or whatever his name is puts on the mask in the waiting room with his parents is as iconic as it is stupid.  Logic clearly thrown out the window, his head is eaten by bugs and snakes for no real reason. Couldn’t they have just implanted the chip to blow up the kid’s heads in one shot? Why have beetles and grasshoppers?

Anyway, let’s get off that uncomfortable subject and talk about the man that is Tom Atkins.  A favorite actor of the horror genre, he puts it down here and also puts it down in the bedroom!  This guy always gets some in his movies, so he gets a pat on the back for that alone.  He also gets a big pat on the back in this movie for his phone scene at the end of the movie where he’s yelling at the station to “Stop It!!!!”.  He knows he’s in a sh*t movie and you can tell he’s milking it for everything it’s worth.  The mark of a true professional.

*maybe if i hide behind this cardboard electrical panel, they won’t see me or my moustache*

A quick fun fact for you regarding Halloween III:  acclaimed horror T-shirt makers Fright Rags is selling a new T-shirt celebrating this achievement in cinematic history. Only problem is that they’re selling out fast, so unless you’re really small or really big, you’re out of luck 🙁  Click HERE to check it out.  Now, to finish up, we have to talk about the Silver Shamrock song.  With it’s monotonous synthy keyboard and sing along lyrics, this song will be stuck in your head most likely before the halfway point of the movie.  It’s as endearing as it is annoying and is definitely the movie’s trademark at the end of the day. So if you’ve always hated Halloween III, I implore you to give it one more try this Halloween and if you still don’t find the charm hidden within it, you can yell at me in blog form.  But if you’ve always loved this movie, you know it’s your duty to gather round the TV for the Horrorthon next week, and watch the pumpkin……watch it……watch……