Review: Terrifier (2018)

Coulrophobia.  I can say that I somewhat suffer from it.  And no, it’s not a fear of mayonnaise (although that is a crippling fear for me).  Coulrophobia is the fear of clowns. It’s not uncommon.  And with the triumphant return of Pennywise the Clown last year in the IT remake, clowns are even more the rage now.  But while Pennywise relies vocally to get his point across, my good friend Art the Clown from the new throwback gore-fest Terrifier relies heavy on facial expressions and sawing bodies in half to get HIS across.    Continue reading

Review: Hereditary (2018)

Ants.  They may not look creepy on the surface, but put them in a horror movie and good things will happen.  And thanks to the new movie Hereditary, you get to see a lot of ants!  And other fucked up shit too that might scar you for life.  Let’s discuss!   Continue reading

Never Forget………

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Oh yeah, and the new Halloween trailer came out today.  I shall reserve my judgement until I see the final product.  But……I am fairly impressed with what I have seen so far. Not as impressed as I was, and always will be, with Ben Tramer’s drunken stooper before he got the life snatched out of him by that cop car though.  RIP.

Sunday Bloody Sunday: ‘Alfonso Ribeiro Turns Into A Giant Tick’ From ‘Ticks’ (1993)

Ya know, yesterday I was having a conversation about ticks with my friends.  What?  You don’t have random tick conversations with YOUR friends?  Psssh.  But anyway, no tick conversation would be complete without mentioning the movie Ticks from 1993.  It is without a doubt, the ‘mother of all tick movies’!  And pretty much the only one.

Welcome to another lovely edition of Sunday Bloody Sunday, where we are taking a trip to Ticks country and revisiting one of the best scenes from the film.  And this scene stars none other than your favorite Tom Jones dancing sidekick to The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air……Alfonso Ribeiro!  Only this time he’s not dancing like a white guy.  He’s turning into a giant tick.  But it’s equally entertaining!  Watch and enjoy:

Anticipation Alert: Upgrade (2018)

Ok, I can admit when I’m wrong.  I originally scoffed and slightly rolled my eyes when I first saw the trailer for the new movie Upgrade.  At the time, I may have been under the influence of something – and also, it hadn’t been confirmed that the movie would indeed be Rated R (which, for a revenge premise is a must in my book).  And yes, that revenge premise has been done to death (no puns needed) – so I was aggressively skeptical.  But……then this Red Band Teaser was released the other week:

Wowsers – that head shot!  BTW – the lead actor in Upgrade, Logan Marshall Green, is in one of my favorite movies in recent years called The Invitation.  Just wanted to add that bit of info.  Upgrade was also written and directed by Leigh Whannell (Saw, Insidious) and is produced by Blumhouse Productions (of course it is….cha-ching!)  But anyway, I am fully onboard now with this one and will most likely do a double-feature with another movie I have been waiting on this weekend called Hereditary.  Cheers to both!  And cheers to gratuitous head shots!

Review: Burn The Priest ‘Legion: XX’ (2018)

It’s always good to remember where you came from.  And luckily, long-time metal powerhouse Lamb Of God have done just that.  For those who don’t know – before frontman Randy Blythe joined the group, Lamb Of God was known as Burn The Priest. Shortly after Blythe put his stamp on the crew, they changed their name and went on to form a metal legacy that continues on today.  But as I stated at the start, you should never forget where you came from – so Burn The Priest has reformed 20 years later to deliver a brand new album full of covers called Legion: XX, featuring tracks that influenced them when they were starting out!

The album kicks open the front door with a cover of ‘Inherit The Earth‘ by 80’s thrash band The Accused.  It’s a different vocal style you may be accustomed to hearing from Blythe, but one that will grab you by the balls and not let go (don’t worry, it won’t feel too uncomfortable).  Mark Morton’s guitar is the co-star of ‘Inherit the Earth‘, ripping and shredding it’s way through the track – which by the way, when it ends…..you want more. Up next is a cover of ‘Honey Bucket‘, one of my favorite songs from The Melvins.  From there, Burn The Priest put their personal  touch on tracks from Bad Brains, Ministry, Agnostic Front, S.O.D., and more.

Even if you’re not necessarily a Lamb Of God fan, you will find something on Legion: XX to sink your metal teeth into.  I personally gave the album the ‘road trip’ test last weekend. I was never bored, and it helped me deal with the aggression that was building up from the idiotic California drivers while on my journey.  Case in point:  I fully support this new Burn The Priest project, even if it is just a project of 10 cover songs.  It’s a bit of a tease, but the good kind of tease.  Slap it in, hit play, and let it go…….you won’t be disappointed.

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(4 Out Of 5)

That Time Siskel & Ebert Shit All Over ‘Hellbound: Hellraiser II’ (1988)

Ah yes, one of my favorite guilty pleasures is back:  Finding old Siskel & Ebert horror movie reviews on Youtube!  Sometimes these two would surprise me with their views on 80’s and 90’s horror……and then other times things would go as according to plan.  Such was the case with the 1988 review of Hellhound: Hellraiser II.  Peep the video below and take a toboggan slide into hell…….

Well clearly all those involved with this movie missed an opportunity to call it Skinned Alive…..at least according to the late great Gene Siskel.  Now granted, I didn’t expect these two to like Hellraiser II – but it always tripped me out with how ‘out of touch’ they sounded with most horror movies they reviewed.  Easily my favorite bit from this particular review was Mr. Ebert proclaiming his annoyance with Kirsty (Ashley Laurence) and Tiffany’s (Imogen Boorman) names being said too much in the film (lol)!  I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again by the way, if you are ever in need of an escape from reality……go on Youtube and watch Siskel & Ebert review old horror movies.  It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

Review: Revenge (2018)

I never really wanted or felt the need to eat peyote.  That is, until I just watched the new revenge-based movie appropriately titled Revenge.  Because now – I realize that if I have a tree branch sticking out of my stomach, I can just take a healthy dose of peyote and everything will work itself out!  Ok, this isn’t a review for peyote…..this is a review for one of the best (and most brutal) revenge movies I’ve ever seen.  Nope, I’m not hallucinating while I type that.  It’s true.  And I’m going to get into why it’s true right about now.   Continue reading

Sunday Bloody Sunday: ‘Gimme A Hand And A Beer’ From ‘Blood Rage’ (1987)

Oh wow….I didn’t realize how long it’s been since my last incarnation of Sunday Bloody Sunday.  I know you all have been fiending and getting the shakes for a new one, so I am here to bring you joy and good news!  And what a way to come back than with a classic scene from 1987’s Blood Rage, pretty much the only true horror movie based around the holiday of Thanksgiving.

Now – if you haven’t seen Blood Rage, then you are missing out.  I will say however, that if you are a fan of Old Style beer – you might want to look away from this clip because it could be quite disturbing for you.  Fun fact:  My first sip of beer was from a can of Old Style.  What else you need to know about the following clip is that the practical effects are top notch cheese.  God bless, fucking 80’s horror and Blood Rage!  Now watch below.  And RIP to that can of beer.  Oh – and that hand too.

Grab Your Official ‘Dawn Of The Dead’ Trading Cards From ‘Fright-Rags’ Now!!

You’re never too old to collect trading cards.  Especially if they are Dawn Of The Dead trading cards!  Wait.  What?  Yep, that’s right.  Fresh off of their successful Re-Animator trading cards, Fright-Rags recently unleashed a preorder for their Dawn Of The Dead card packs!

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Gotta love that design!  And, as a bonus – each pack will actually glow-in-the-dark.  In addition to getting 9 trading cards and 1 sticker in each pack, you could also receive a randomly inserted artist sketch or chase card as well.  As I mentioned earlier….Fright-Rags released a Re-Animator set last year and having bought more than a few packs myself, I can say that the quality is superb.  I expect the same with these, and you can go over to the Fright-Rags site HERE to order some.  Act fast though, because there are only about 150 single packs left.  You can also buy a sealed box for $120 right HERE as well.