When Conjoined Twins Go Wild: Belial From ‘Basket Case’ (1982)

Man, we’ve all been there:  Fed up with life, the world just constantly beating us down, and our former conjoined twin pushing us to act unruly and trash a hotel room.  Yeah, it pretty much happens every day – especially with cheesy stop motion effects courtesy of the 80’s.

But yes, I’m talking about the movie Basket Case.  A true ‘b-movie’ classic, not just in the form of 80’s horror – but cinema in general.  And one of the more enjoyably ridiculous scenes is when our favorite little wicker basket dweller Belial goes on a rampage and tears apart the hotel room that he and his brother Duane are staying in.  So please, stop what you’re doing and click the link below and enjoy.  Belial would have wanted it that way.

Let’s All Groove To The Sound Of The ‘TerrorVision’ Theme Song!

Work got you down?  Is your significant other farting too much in front of you?  Well, I’ve got just the thing to turn that frown upside down and shake your blues loose.  And that thing is…..a theme song!  Not just any theme song though – the theme song from the 1986 horror cult classic TerrorVision.  Put together by the LA rock band The Fibonaccis – it’s easily one of my favorite horror theme songs ever, as it captures the vibe of the movie perfectly.  Now click ‘play’ below on the Youtube clip and thank me later…….

Ya know – after listening to that song again, I really anticipate hearing Fred Schneider from The B-52s jump in at some point (insert terrible Fred Schneider impersonation HERE). But alas, he did not – however we are still left with that 80’s horror soundtrack goodness and the TerrorVision soundtrack as a whole is pretty worthy of your time and earholes. Oh, and the movie ain’t too shabby either.  Especially if you’re into slimy orgies and guys who wear W.A.S.P. t-shirts

Horror Movie Posters I Love: Trick Or Treat (1986)

“What would we do baby, without us??  What would we dooooo baby, without us???” Oh, sorry.  For whatever reason I have the Family Ties theme song stuck in my head today. And then I got to thinking about Skippy (Marc Price) from that show.  And that of course got me to thinking about the 1986 horror/metal hybrid Trick Or Treat!  I always loved the original poster art for this movie, so I wanted to show some love to it.  So…….gaze your eyes on that Sammi Curr prize below!

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To me, this is a quintessential 80’s horror movie because it combines the horror AND the metal – two of my passions back then and still today.  But the poster art really stuck out to me, including the font used for the title.  The use of the jack-o-lantern is rad (figured I’d use an 80’s term there), and the tagline “What are you afraid of? It’s only rock & roll.” hits my horror spot.  Seek this movie out this coming Halloween, as I feel a lot of people forget about it.  A proper Blu-ray/DVD release would be ideal (I’m looking at you, Scream Factory) – but until then, scrounge up your old DVD copies and watch it on Youtube if you have to!  Sha la la la………

Trailer Trash: ‘Mountaintop Motel Massacre’ (1986)

WARNINGBefore you watch the original 1986 trailer for Mountaintop Motel Massacre, please be aware that the following are included in the trailer:

–  terrible car singing

–  a lazy voiceover guy who sounds like he wants to be anywhere but the trailer

–  wet t-shirts with protruding nipples

–  a lot of people just saying or yelling out different names

–  a guy saying the phrase “No way, Jose!” 

–  also, they pretty much give the whole movie away in the trailer

Well, if you still watched despite all of my warnings, then…..congratulations!   You were in for the ‘protruding nipples’, weren’t you?  But anyway – Mountaintop Motel Massacre (I always felt there should be a ‘The’ in the title) is good cheesy 80’s horror fun, and you can now own a sparkling Blu-ray transfer of it from Vinegar Syndrome HERE.  And yes, the ‘protruding nipples’ are included in the price.  Hooray!

Great Moments In Horror Hair History: Cujo The Dog (1983)

Who says only stereotypical blonde bimbos in 80’s horror movies can have great hair?  Move over, stereotypical blonde bimbos…..there’s new fur in town.  I know it might be ‘ruff’ to realize that a rabid St. Bernard dog might show you up in the hair department, but let me introduce you to………..Cujo!

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Control yourself, everybody.  There are enough blood-soaked luscious locks to go around.  Oh sure, Cujo could use a bath.  He is a bit smelly, especially with the overpowering iron-based blood dripping all over his hair.  But you can’t deny, he’s quite the specimen.  Don’t let a little foaming at the mouth stop us from inducting Cujo into the class of Great Moments In Horror Hair History!  Now someone get him a napkin, please.

Horror Movie Posters I Love: Mausoleum (1983)

Sometimes I like to just gaze upon poster art for 80’s horror movies.  And a lot of times, that poster art is better than the actual movie.  So, let’s see……I wonder if the 1983 movie Mausoleum is all poster art and ‘no bite’, as far as the actual movie goes.  I’ll get to the latter in a minute, as I recently re-visited Mausoleum on Amazon Prime.  But first……the poster!

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Well damn.  Isn’t she a beauty.  The ‘dripping blood’ font in the title….the predictable, but clever tagline (Centuries of evil have just awakened)….and the rather cool looking skeleton gripping the mausoleum.  All signs point to the poster art being better than the movie!  But seriously folks – how fun were the 80’s when it came to horror?

Speaking of fun – did you know that none other than Aunt Esther from Sanford and Son (LaWanda Page) is in this movie???  Oh – and her scene is soooooo Aunt Esther.  But anyway – like I said, I recently watched Mausoleum again and……it stinks.  But in a good 80’s horror stinky way.  Like some aged cheese.  The poster art still gives me a horror boner, but if you have time and want a good time – seek out Mausoleum and embrace the 80’s madness!

Sunday Bloody Sunday: ‘Gimme A Hand And A Beer’ From ‘Blood Rage’ (1987)

Oh wow….I didn’t realize how long it’s been since my last incarnation of Sunday Bloody Sunday.  I know you all have been fiending and getting the shakes for a new one, so I am here to bring you joy and good news!  And what a way to come back than with a classic scene from 1987’s Blood Rage, pretty much the only true horror movie based around the holiday of Thanksgiving.

Now – if you haven’t seen Blood Rage, then you are missing out.  I will say however, that if you are a fan of Old Style beer – you might want to look away from this clip because it could be quite disturbing for you.  Fun fact:  My first sip of beer was from a can of Old Style.  What else you need to know about the following clip is that the practical effects are top notch cheese.  God bless, fucking 80’s horror and Blood Rage!  Now watch below.  And RIP to that can of beer.  Oh – and that hand too.

Behold! The Best Compilation Clip Montage Of ‘Pieces’ Ever!!

Ok, so I’m a little biased because my friend did this – but, if you love the movie Pieces (and if you don’t, kindly get the fuck off my blog) then you should be entertained by the following compilation of some of the best (and worst) scenes in the movie.  All you need to know is that the ‘tennis scene’ is included.  Oh – and get down to the funky sounds of Ween at the beginning and end of the video too!  And you better like this, or you are nothing but a bastarrrrrrrrrrd!!!!!

I Seem To Have ‘The Brain’ On My Brain…..

Quick.  What’s the best horror movie about a gigantic man-eating brain?!?  Ahhh – if you didn’t say 1988’s Canadian horror yuck-fest The Brain, then you can see yourself out the door.  I hadn’t thought about this movie in ages.  I remember watching the VHS copy when I was like 12.  And although the premise is about as stupid as you would think for an 80’s horror movie (TV show host brainwashes his viewers and plans to rule the world), I dug the hell out of The Brain!

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Cut to why I’m writing about it now, and that would be because one of the best resin toy makers in the game, Deadly Delivery (a collab effort of Retroband and Zectron), recently released a mini version of our favorite man-eating brain!  You can catch a glimpse HERE, but unfortunately it is now sold out.  But it really got me to thinking about this movie.  And it really got me to thinking about how it needs a proper Blu-ray release too.  It never even received a proper DVD release either (sad frowny face).

So let’s all put our brains together and think about how we can make this happen.  More people need to see The Brain!  It’s common knowledge.  Oh, I know what we can do!  We can take it to the streets like they did in the 60’s.  I’m sure no one would be annoyed if I was preaching the greatness of The Brain through a megaphone while shoving clips from the movie in people’s faces as they walk out of Target after shopping.  But until we win the battle of getting this underrated 80’s horror gem it’s Blu-ray due, why don’t you just search on Youtube to watch the movie in full.  I’ll allow it.

Anticipation Alert: Victor Crowley (2018)

The year was 2006.  I had just recently moved to Los Angeles.  Gas prices were relatively low.  And a young filmmaker named Adam Green was busy bringing ‘Old School American Horror‘ back!  Yes, that’s right – the 80’s homage/throwback Hatchet was born.  And thus, it’s villain Victor Crowley was as well (thanks in large part to Kane Hodder).  I remember watching Hatchet for the first time, almost blindly buying the DVD.  What I was treated to was indeed a love letter to the horror that I grew up on in the 80’s: Unapologetically nasty gore, inventive kills, boobs, and boobs.  Did I mention boobs?

Adam Green would go on to give us two more Hatchet sequels in the aftermath of the success of the original.  Now, I’m not ashamed to admit that they didn’t really hit my horror spot as much as the first time I saw Victor Crowley grace the screen with his horribly disfigured swampy face.  I liked the sequels, but the vibe felt off to me.  But now……..Victor Crowley is back in 2018 and he’s looking like his old self!  For better or worse, that is.  Yes – the aptly titled Victor Crowley is the fourth (and maybe final) sequel in the Hatchet series and if the first full trailer is any indication, it will go out on a high body count note!  Check it out below and get your preorder in for the Blu-ray/DVD over at Amazon HERE for a super good price.