Monday Bloody Monday: ‘Infested Clint Howard’ From ‘Ticks’ (1993)

Al Pacino won Best Actor at the 1993 Academy Awards for his role in Scent Of A Woman, but there was some terrible injustice going on while he was graciously accepting his award.  And that injustice is that Clint Howard was NOT nominated for his breathtaking and groundbreaking role in Ticks.  For those in the dark here, Ticks is a horror movie about giant killer ticks.  It definitely delivers what it promises in the title.

Welcome to Monday Bloody Monday where I am indeed going to give Mr. Clint Howard the shine that he deserves from his role as Jarvis Tanner in Ticks.  Behold greatness and watch as Clint tells the daughter of Micky Dolenz from The Monkees that he’s infested.  Then brace yourself for acting impact while his head explodes over her.  After watching, feel free to contact the Academy with a barrage of emails voicing your displeasure over this HUGE oversight.  We should all be very ticked off about this.  Puns!

Monday Bloody Monday: ‘Exploding Sex’ From ‘Frankenhooker’ (1990)

Picking a good scene from Frankenhooker is like trying to choose a pie at Baker’s Square…..there’s just too many good ones to choose from!  And yes, I just actually got a Baker’s Square reference into a post.

Welcome to Monday Bloody Monday where I am indeed going to choose a scene from Frank Henenlotter’s 1990 horror comedy Frankenhooker.  Haven’t seen Frankenhooker by the way?  Then I should make you do the walk of shame like Cersei in Game Of Thrones.  Now I really wanted to put up the the scene where all of the hookers explode simultaneously, but Youtube isn’t cooperating.  So instead, I’ll throw you the scene where the creepy older guy looking for paid sex gets more than he bargained for.  He did look happy in the end though, so that’s all that matters.

On Second Thought: Killing Someone With An Ear Of Corn Is Pretty Amazing

If you had to kill someone, how would you do it?  I know – that’s a heavy question for a Thursday.  But if your answer includes corn on the cob, then you’re either a hardcore vegetarian or you’ve been daydreaming about 1992’s killer human cat movie, Sleepwalkers.

I’ve spoken about this particular scene before, but it’s so random and so strange that it needs to be spoken about again.  Sleepwalkers I suppose, would be the definition of a ‘guilty pleasure’.  It has a preposterous plot, some cheesy morphing effects, and an eyebrow-raising incestuous relationship between mother and son (Mary and Charles Brady).  Only one thing could upstage incest though, and that’s a death scene that involves a delicious ear of corn.

As far as snappy one-liners go, it doesn’t get much better than “No vegetables, no dessert!“.  What the hell is up with the music though?  A bit too orchestral for a horror movie if you ask me, but then again we’re talking about a movie here where vegetables are being used as killing tools.  Pushing all of the bad shit aside from Sleepwalkers (and trust me there is plenty), this corn cob scene forgives most of it and almost single-handedly pushes the movie into cult horror status.  Not only that, but it reminds me of when I would eat corn on the cob as a child and act like I was a typewriter, munching back and forth and even making the appropriate sound effects.  Please disregard that last sentence.

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Sunday Bloody Sunday: ‘Psychiatrist Death’ From ‘Candyman’ (1992)

Going to a psychiatrist can be such a drag, man.  Especially if you say “Candyman” five times and the hook-handed legend himself appears to cause some major bloody damage while grunting loudly.  Welcome to Sunday Bloody Sunday where I’m showcasing one of my favorite death scenes from 1992’s, Candyman.

I think this might be Candyman’s most dominating kill.  And by dominating, I mean he really gets that hook all up in the back of the psychiatrist and grunts and moans like nobody’s business.  He’s angry.  He’s pissed.  He may be a little turned on, but that’s debatable.  You can be the judge while you watch the clip below:

Sunday Bloody Sunday: ‘Punch To The Face’ From ‘Demon Knight’ (1995)

Believe it or not, punching your fist through someone’s head can have it’s downside.  It might get stuck, and in turn, make your hand very uncomfortable.  Especially when a guardian of a key containing the blood of Jesus Christ is playing a game of cat and mouse with you.

Welcome to this week’s Sunday Bloody Sunday where I’m spotlighting one of my favorite horror guilty pleasures of all time:  1995’s, Demon Knight.  My love for this movie deserves it’s own separate post, but I’ll give you a delicious taste with a scene that really kicks things off in the movie.  And that scene would be when Billy Zane’s character puts his fist through the head of the local Barney Fife.  Hilarity ensues as he tries to get it unstuck, and the result is a headless town sheriff.  It happens more often than you think.

Horror Hijinks: “We Hear You’re Looking For Candyman, Bitch.”

Unintentional comedy in a horror movie is always a bonus.  Some might look at it in a negative way, because the comedy might take you out of the moment.  But I for one, am all for it!  Case in point:  1992’s, Candyman.

To be honest, Candyman is one of the only movies that truly gave me the creeps.  I love the villain (Tony Todd nails it) and LOVE the whole backstory involved with him.  The hook.  The bees.  The gruff, deep voice.  It freaked me out too because I used to play the ‘Bloody Mary’ game when I was little, where you had to say her name multiple times while looking in a mirror to see if she would appear.  So, obviously the similarities are there with Candyman.

Let’s talk comedy though and about one scene in particular.  After Helen goes snooping around a bathroom trying to get answers about the Candyman legend, she’s encountered by a group of thugs and is roughed up.  And the main thug says “We hear you’re looking for Candyman, bitch!” right before the roughing up begins.  Cut to the police station where a few guys are put up in a lineup for Helen to see and hear as they mutter the memorable line and BOOM!  Pure comedy gold:

Wow.  Put a steak on that eye, Helen.  That’s quite a Fred Flintstone influenced shiner you have there.  But anyway, I can’t help but laugh every time I see this scene.  And it provides some ever so slight balance to all of the horrifying things that have happened up until this moment in the movie.  Gotta love the contrast of voices between the first and second guy too.  In fact, I think I know why I love this scene so much now.  It reminds me of Eddie Murphy’s classic ‘banana in the tailpipe’ line from Beverly Hills Cop!