When Pregnancies Go Bad: Species 2 (1998)

I don’t have any children, but if I did I would imagine that watching them be born would be a wondrous and breathtaking experience.  I’m sure there’s nothing gross about it, unless of course you have it in your head that birth is something like in that scene in 1998’s Species 2.  Why the hell are you watching Species 2 btw?

Oh, it was ME that was watching Species 2.  Guilty as charged!  But anyway, it’s a pretty terrible movie – save for some entertaining gore and Natasha Henstridge getting topless again.  Let us not forget about the infamous birthing scene though, over-exaggerated facial expressions and all.  Check it out below and stay to the end for Marg Helgenberger to tell you just how awful it is:

Review: Crawl (2019)

If I could be any animal or reptile, I would be an alligator.  I’m sure my readers just had their minds blown by that statement, but it’s true.  Always fascinated with them growing up, I’ve never actually seen one in the wild – and I’ve never been in a hurricane either.  Why did I just mention a hurricane?  Oh – because the new movie Crawl is based on alligators running amuck during a hurricane in Florida.  And guess what?  I loved this movie!  Continue reading

Sunday Bloody Sunday: ‘The Wedding Attack’ From ‘Alligator’ (1980)

Whoa!  The return of Sunday Bloody Sunday!  Since everybody has ‘alligator fever’ right now because of the newly released ‘creature feature’ Crawl (I shall be seeing it today btw), I figured I would go back to my original killer alligator movie that I adored as a child:  Alligator!  (they really knew how to give a horror movie a title back then)

Yes, Alligator – the 80’s movie that showed us the downside to flushing a baby alligator down the toilet.  And probably one of the most famous scenes in the movie is the ‘wedding scene’.  Do you like seeing people scurry in a panic bumping into each other and falling into a pool?  Do you like seeing a giant mutated alligator whack those people with his giant mutated tail and send them hilariously flying through the air?  Do you like seeing a wedding cake get demolished?  If you answered yes to at least one of those questions, then please watch the carnage unfold below:

Great Moments In Jump Scare History: ‘The Hallway Scene’ From ‘The Prodigy’ (2019)

I enjoy being scared.  No, really – I do.  And there’s nothing better than a good ol’ fashioned jump scare in a horror movie.  It takes a lot to get me to spill my Goobers everywhere or grab onto the total stranger sitting next to me – but when it happens, it’s pretty horror-gasmic.  See what I did there?  Anyway, thanks to my surprise sleeper horror movie so far this year, The Prodigy – I did get a good little jolt in my pants.  Watch the scene below and wait for the moment in the hallway……

Now, imagine being a theater on opening weekend when it was somewhat crowded and that scene happened.  It’s like, you kind of knew something was coming – but at the same time, it seemed like the kid was just going to run and hug his Mom like a normal scared kid would.  Either way, it’s effective and The Prodigy overall was pretty effective in my opinion.  Seek it out if you can, because there’s one other scene that didn’t necessarily make me jump – but it was creepy and well done and got a few yelps from the audience when I saw it. (hint, hint – it’s another face changing scene)

Static-X Is Out On A 20th Anniversary Tour For ‘Wisconsin Death Trip’……With A Mysterious New Frontman!

I am far from ashamed to admit that I was a huge fan of the Nu-Metal movement in the late 90’s/early 2000’s.  Yes, I listened to Korn.  Yes, I listened to (gulp) Limp Bizkit.  And one of my favorite, and somewhat underrated bands, was Static-X.  Their music was also deemed ‘evil disco’ by lead singer Wayne Static, which described not only the sound the band had – but also the energy they brought onstage.

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Sadly, Wayne passed away a few years back amidst tensions still going on with him and the other original members of Static-X.  But alas, the three surviving original members (Tony Campos, Koichi Fukuda, and Ken Jay) have gotten the band back together for a 20th Anniversary tour of the band’s seminal debut album Wisconsin Death Trip!  The best part:  This tour mostly serves as a memorial tribute to Wayne Static, with a mysterious frontman named Xer0 stepping into Wayne’s shoes (and hair) to pay proper homage.

Now, I’ve seen footage of this tour already and it looks pretty amazing. The energy is there – and it’s a finished product that Wayne would be proud of.  It’s also pretty much known who the identity of Xer0 is, but I’ll zip my lips for now to avoid giving away any spoilers. Support from Dope, DevilDriver, Wednesday 13, and Raven Black as openers on the tour.  So, head on over to the band’s website HERE for more info on the tour dates, upcoming new album, and more!  Fun fact:  Wayne used to be in a band with Billy Corgan before he formed Static-X.

Review: Child’s Play (2019)

Can I get my crow barbecued, please?  Yeah – I’m eating crow now because I poo-pooed the new remake/reboot of Child’s Play before it opened this past weekend.  Actually, I kind of dug the first trailer and had an open mind.  And when Mark Hamill was announced as the voice of Chucky (aka Buddi), my mind was even more open.  Then the second trailer dropped and I had doubts, at which point the poo-pooing began.  Next were the ads of Chucky destroying various Toy Story characters (that movie opened the same weekend), which seemed like ‘desperation time’ for me.  But…..low and behold – Child’s Play was actually (gulp) GOOD.   Continue reading

Let’s Have Another Staring Contest…….

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Oh no!  It’s Chucky!  Or…..I mean, Buddi!  Or…..Chucky!  I don’t know, it’s all very confusing.  But regardless, it’s that doll from that new Child’s Play movie.  Look at those piercing, haunting blue eyes.  No seriously, look at them or you’re going to lose the staring contest.  Stay focused, man!  Try not to think about the comparisons to the original Chucky doll.  Or the fact that Brad Dourif isn’t doing the voice this time.  Or the fact that Luke Skywalker is.  (Throws coins on the ground)  Wait, that doll was distracted by money and you win the staring contest!  Seems fitting.  Oh – and go see Child’s Play this weekend.  Or don’t.  Either way it’s all good.

I’m Kinda In Love With This New Etched Version Of ‘Pennywise’ From NECA!

Ok, I’ll get this out in the open first:  I didn’t love the 2017 version of IT.  I know I may be somewhat in the minority there, as I’ve stated in the past, but it didn’t (bad pun coming up) float my boat.  Having said that, I am looking forward to IT: Chapter 2 as the trailer pretty much blew me away, as well as the star-power acting wise that’s involved.  Now that I got that out of the way, I have to give some love to this new ‘etched’ version of Pennywise from NECA for it’s 2019 San Diego Comic-Con release:

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I know that NECA alone has released a lot of versions of the new Pennywise character, but this one kind of blows me a way.  Based on the Derry Charter engravings from the movie (where Pennywise is seen) – the figure stands 7″, comes in a display box that opens to reveal the figure, along with two head sculpts and two balloons.  Pre-orders on the NECA website have unfortunately closed – so grab one if you’re lucky enough to go to SDCC this year in July or snag one off eBay for a good price now (I was lucky enough to get one pretty much at cost).  For more pics and details, go HERE and scroll down!

Klaus Kinski Creeps Me Out!

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Ahhh!!!  See?  He’s creepy!  And he’s wearing lipstick!  Not that there’s anything wrong with that.  It just…..makes him a little creepier.  The point of this post?  Not much – just to get it out there that Klaus Kinski is creepy.  Oh – and if you haven’t seen Crawlspace (a nice little flick from the 80’s horror golden era), then give it a whirl and watch Klaus go full Nazi on a bunch of people.  And yes, as the title suggests, there is a crawlspace involved.  For added incentive, watch the trailer below:

That One Time Lonnie Got His Ass Away From There…… (Halloween – 1978)

Oh, Halloween.  Not the holiday, but the movie.  Even though I do love the holiday.  I guess they kind of go hand-in-hand.  What am I rambling about?  Oh yeah – Halloween!  It scared the shit out of me when I was a kid and to this day is pretty much horror movie perfection.  But, there’s always a scene that makes me chuckle.  A scene, other than when Michael Myers is driving, that stirs the crowd into a frenzy at screenings of the movie.  And that scene is………..

That Lonnie was a little shit.  And good for Loomis for telling his ass to get away from the Myers house!  Better that than have little Lonnie get his ass stabbed by Mikey.  But it’s just the whole delivery that Donald Pleasence brings to the line that makes it a crowd favorite.  And that little smirk.  That semi-giggle.  He was so proud of his zinger.  And he should have been.  Who knows by the way – maybe Loomis’ threatening verbiage steered Lonnie onto the right path in life, and maybe he went on to become a successful……ah, who gives a shit.