I have to admit that I’ve become a bit obsessed and fascinated by the folklore involving Krampus, the horned and hoofed creature that would come around at Christmastime to torment bad little girls and boys. Had I known about it as a child, I probably would have behaved much better considering the alternative if Krampus ever found me. No child wants to be stuffed into a burlap sack and dragged away to a cave to be eaten. And now finally, we will get a proper movie version of the story, thanks to writer/director Michael Dougherty, appropriately titled Krampus.
Well that looks like a lot of fun, doesn’t it?!? For those living under a rock for the last 8 years, Michael Dougherty wrote and directed the AMAZING Halloween anthology movie, Trick ‘r Treat. And if you’ve seen that (and shame on you if you haven’t), then you can see his stamp all over the Krampus trailer stylistically and with the tongue-in-cheek humor.
We haven’t had a really good Christmas horror movie in a while (Rare Exports was good, but more fantasy than horror in my opinion), so Krampus will be welcomed with open arms when it’s released in December. Hopefully it will live up to the hype of the trailer and of the poster below, which somehow reminds me of another Christmastime horror movie called Elves. Let’s just all hope that the comparisons stop at the poster for that one. Look for Krampus in what will most likely be a small theater run (although I’m hoping for a bigger one) on December 4th!
Being that it’s the time of the year for giving, I’m giving you this thought provoking explanation for the correlation between elves and Nazis courtesy of 1989’s enjoyable crapfest, Elves. I first gave you this joyous gift last year, and from now on, it will remain a Dirty Horror holiday tradition! Season’s Greetings – and yes, that’s Grizzly Adams in the clip.
The necessary holiday horror movie is a little tough to come by. Of course you can go with Black Christmas, Silent Night Deadly Night, or even Gremlins if you so choose. Or you can go with the festive film that tells the tale of evil Nazi elves that must mate with a virgin on Christmas Eve to produce an unstoppable master race. Yes, I’m talking about 1989’s Elves, a movie that truly belongs in the Christmas Crap sack. I have fond memories of seeing the VHS box for this clunker when I was younger in our local Mom & Pop video store. And it proved to me that sometimes a movie poster or VHS cover back then could be deceiving! The hell you say?! Here’s the cover:
Well I guess after a second look, the awful tagline font could have been a dead giveaway that this movie was shit. But I was young, so give me a break. Anyway, that was the cover that lured me in. And here’s what I actually got:
Now unfortunately, Elves has never been released on DVD, but if there is a petition for it to be, I would sign it in a minute and you should too. If you still have a VCR though, you can round up a used copy for about $30. It’s a horror movie, and a holiday movie at that, that deserves to be seen, even if it’s not for all of the right reasons. Need more convincing? I’ll leave you with this clip where our hero, Grizzly Adams, demands an explanation on these mischievous Nazi elves: