Sunday Bloody Sunday: ‘The Wedding Attack’ From ‘Alligator’ (1980)

Whoa!  The return of Sunday Bloody Sunday!  Since everybody has ‘alligator fever’ right now because of the newly released ‘creature feature’ Crawl (I shall be seeing it today btw), I figured I would go back to my original killer alligator movie that I adored as a child:  Alligator!  (they really knew how to give a horror movie a title back then)

Yes, Alligator – the 80’s movie that showed us the downside to flushing a baby alligator down the toilet.  And probably one of the most famous scenes in the movie is the ‘wedding scene’.  Do you like seeing people scurry in a panic bumping into each other and falling into a pool?  Do you like seeing a giant mutated alligator whack those people with his giant mutated tail and send them hilariously flying through the air?  Do you like seeing a wedding cake get demolished?  If you answered yes to at least one of those questions, then please watch the carnage unfold below:

Get In On This Kickstarter For These Figures From ‘The Deadly Spawn’!

If I’m every talking about ‘guilty pleasure’ horror films, there’s no way that I won’t bring up the blood-soaked bonkers flick from 1983, The Deadly Spawn.  I still remember seeing this movie on a Saturday afternoon on regular TV when I was about 10……completely unedited, which blew my little adolescent mind (when I said blood-soaked earlier btw, I wasn’t kidding).  Aside from the red stuff, the creature fx done by John Dods were actually top notch – considering the film’s overall lower budget feel.  And now, there is a Kickstarter going on where you can pick up some newly sculpted figures that pay homage to Dods’ earlier work from The Deadly Spawn!

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This project, started by Justin Ishmael, will feature a variety of options to choose from as far as what your pleasure is.  James Groman (of Madballs fame) is sculpting the new tiny versions of The Deadly Spawn creatures, and you can get them either painted or unpainted.  The goal is $20k, to be reached by September 27th.  Right now, it’s at about $13k, so…..looking good!  You can get plenty of more details HERE and place an order for your figure too!  And if you haven’t seen The Deadly Spawn……what the hell are you waiting for???

When Going ‘Ape Shit’ Goes Wrong: Wooley From ‘Dawn Of The Dead’ (1978)

Sometimes there’s a character in a horror movie that we wish would have stayed around  a little longer, just so we could get more of their zany antics.  Case in point:  Wooley from the original Dawn Of The Dead!

Now, slight spoiler alert before you watch the following clip:  Wooley dies.  Yeah, he deserves it.  But man oh man is it fun to watch him go full on ‘ape shit’ before he bites the bullet.  Wooley is a self-proclaimed hothead and doesn’t mind spouting off the occasional racial slur either.  All the more reason that it’s best that Ken Foree takes him down before he could do anymore damage with his gun or his mouth.  So let’s pull up a chair and enjoy Wooley’s final 48 seconds of glory in Youtube form:

Let’s Have Another Staring Contest…….

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A bit of a challenge this week – because you have to beat not one, but two sets of eyes! You can do it though.  Just don’t be a dummy and fuck up.  Oh, I should mention that one of your opponents is actually a dummy.  Focus, my friend.  Sir Anthony Hopkins is going to try and break you while gazing into your eyes like a hungry Hannibal Lecter.  I would shift your focus to Fats the ventriloquist dummy, because he looks more weak.  I wish he would close his mouth though because that’s distracting.  Oh wait!  A sexy female ventriloquist dummy just came in the room and Fats looked away!  You win!!  And so does Fats because he’s about to have hot dummy sex in a minute.

That One Time Gunnar Hansen Fought Giant Mosquitos With A Chainsaw!

I was thinking the other day about SyFy Channel movies.  Not sure why necessarily, but they were on my mind.  And all of this reminiscing made me think back to one of the first movies I saw on the channel, although not specifically made for it (like Sharknado per say).  And that movie was:  Mosquito!!!

Mosquito is not only up there with some of the best movies the Syfy Channel has ever put on (Ice Spiders, anyone?), but it also has the late great Gunnar Hansen fighting off these giant blood-thirsty mosquitos with…….wait for it…….a chainsaw!!  Oh – I guess the surprise was minimized since I already gave it away in the title of the post.  But anyway – if you’re not a believer of Mosquito yet and want to judge for yourself whether or not it sucks (haha), then watch the clip below and enjoy all of the glorious B-movie action. Hahaha – I said ‘sucks’.

Things That I’m Thankful For This Year!

I figured that I should probably write something before my entire body is feeling the effects of the tryptophan.  So yes, it’s time for another Thanksgiving and another year of giving my readers a few things that I’m thankful for in 2017.  So put down your third piece of pumpkin pie and let me grab your attention for a minute.

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So I Revisited 1991’s ‘Body Parts’ Recently…….

Guy loses arm in a horrible car crash.  Guy gets new arm attached from a convicted serial killer who just recently died on death row.  Guy meets other guys who also have had said serial killer’s limbs attached to their bodies as well.  Guy stops evil doctors from re-collecting all of the serial killer’s body parts back (oh and there’s an attached severed head in there too somewhere).  Sorry.  26-year-old spoiler alerts.

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Ah yes.  The 1991 movie known as Body Parts.  One of actor Jeff Fahey’s finest moments.  And Brad Dourif is in it too.  Directed and co-written by Eric Red (Bad Moon, The Hitcher, Near Dark), Body Parts is a 90’s horror movie that actually feels soooo 80’s. I mean that as a compliment of course.  The storyline, for better or worse, is possibly one of the most ridiculous in terms of believability.  But then again, if you’re watching a 90’s horror movie named Body Parts – chances are you’re throwing logic immediately out the window.

I always remember seeing the poster for the movie hanging up in my local video store and appreciating the artistic side of it.  I hadn’t watched the actual movie though in quite some time.  Rewind back to the other night when I was surfing around through my channel guide and I saw Body Parts pop up on Cinemax (which on certain nights with a title like that, could be an entirely different kind of movie – bow chicka bow bow).  I was delighted to see that it still holds up!  Minus the obvious dummies used for Brad Dourif’s death scene of course.  Sorry.  Another 26-year-old spoiler alert.  But anyway, if you haven’t experienced the wonders of Eric Red’s Body Parts, then get off your ass and do it!  Or just sit on your couch and casually watch it on Cinemax or something.

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You Need To Know About ‘Death By Toys’!

Over the past few years, I’ve been a bit of a custom horror toy collector.  Some might call it an addiction, whereas I call it ‘mind your own business’.  So needless to say, I was pretty blown away when I first stumbled upon a company called Death By Toys – and more specifically a custom toy they did for the John Carpenter movie, The Fog.  What made it so special, you ask?  Because it was unapologetically just some cotton labeled as ‘Some Fog‘ on the front cover of the package.  Some might say it was lazy, but I say it was absolutely genius.  And from then on, I was a Death By Toys fan and started to build my collection.

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Now as you can see from the pic, there is a Happy Birthday To Me kebab playset and also a ‘bunch of pieces’ from the movie Pieces.  Again, a fairly simple (and I mean that in a good way) idea that is executed so well that it deserves all of the praise I’m giving it and more.  Still not convinced?  Go over to the Death By Toys online store HERE and look at some of the other creations and also look at the fact that they are all SOLD OUT.  Needless to say, I’m looking forward to any future releases from this company and if you’re a horror fan (or just custom toy fan in general) you should be too.  And now I have some spare cotton if I ever need it too.

When Old Ladies And Beetles Attack: Prince Of Darkness (1987)

I just had the pleasure of seeing John Carpenter perform his music live last night (on Halloween nonetheless) for the second time in 2 years.  And just like the first time, when I walked away from the concert I thought about one of his movies.  And thinking about that movie made me think about an old lady with scissors in her hand.  And it also made me think about a bunch of black beetles, but my thoughts had nothing to do with a mannequin challenge.  What the hell am I babbling about?  Well, this clip from Prince Of Darkness of course!

Prince Of Darkness is probably my favorite ‘least favorite’ John Carpenter movie.  The plot and pacing is all over the place.  But it has Alice Cooper in it.  And it also has the clip above and many more like it that honestly rank up there with Carpenter’s creepiest throughout his career.  This clip with the old lady attacking that poor bastard with the scissors definitely has an Argento vibe to me (the close up on the scissors before they strike down), even though I feel there should have been more blood on the scissors – but I digress. Nitpicking is an art.

The point is, that I think every time I do watch Prince Of Darkness – I like it more.  It’s a grower, and not an immediate shower for me.  Oh – and go check out Mr. Carpenter on his current tour supporting is new Anthology album.  Where else are you going to hear the theme from Vampires live, after all?

Give Me The Creeps: ‘Hanging Around’ From ‘Sinister’ (2012)

There’s nothing like an effective creepy beginning scene to a horror movie.  Especially a scene that makes you feel uneasy, like if you’re watching a snuff film that you shouldn’t be. Fun Fact:  I loved the 2012 movie Sinister.  The sequel that came out in 2015, not so much.  But the original kinda blew me away, and in the horror world it actually attempted to do something a little different.  That’s a rare feat nowadays, and one of the things that I loved about Sinister was the opening scene.  No set up.  No warning.

I still remember watching this scene in the theater.  I squirmed in my seat a little and may have squeezed the hand of the person next to me (who may have been a stranger). Luckily for Sinister, the rest of the movie followed suit with the creepiness (lawn mower scene, anyone?) and we even got a satisfying equally creepy ending too.  Too bad Sinister 2 sucked ass, but at least we have the original to fall back on if we ever need to see how it’s done right.  I’ll be attending Universal’s Halloween Horror Nights in Hollywood this weekend and they will have a partial maze built around the Sinister universe.  If they’re smart, they’ll somehow incorporate this ‘hanging family’ scene into it. Now – fuck you, Sinister for giving me the creeps!