Rental Regrets: Scared Stiff (1987)

Much like that overstuffed burrito I just ate, I’m full of regrets.  Most would say I’m also full of something else, but regrets are what we’re talking about right now.  And I always had regrets back in my VHS-renting days of horror movies that I couldn’t quite pull the trigger on.  Enter into the mix the 1987 blockbuster Scared Stiff!  I figured if I threw the word ‘blockbuster’ in there that you would be more inclined to keep reading.


Ahhhh – look at that beauty.  How did I never rent this?  Oh I’m sure I just passed it by and rented Slumber Party Massacre II for the tenth time.  I’m always a sucker for good title font, and I actually kind of dig it here.  Reading the synopsis more closely, it looks as though the plot revolved around voodoo curses and slave owners.  Not exactly my cup of tea when I was a 13-year-old horror movie upstart, but I’m sure I could have taken a chance on it.  Looks as though Variety magazine was quoted as saying that Scared Stiff was “……..too explicit for the squeamish.”  What the hell, man?!  I love explicit things!  Only one way to settle this once and for all and see if I should finally watch it.  To the Youtube trailer!

Oh man.  I’m sold!  And it looks as though the only thing that’s really explicit is the bad acting.  And those terrible effects too.  This has ‘pack and bowl and watch’ written all over it.  I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that Scared Stiff has probably not gotten the Blu-ray treatment thus far.  That’s ok, I’m sure I can find a watchable version on eBay.  Let me look……(do do do….do do do….do do do).  Ok, I’m back.  Didn’t find a VHS or DVD, but I did find THIS.  For those who don’t want to click the link, it’s a promotional paper weight for the film.  So……if you’ve ever wanted a Scared Stiff paper weight, there you go.