Tag Archives: best french horror movies

Ebay Find Of The Week: Promotional ‘High Tension’ Matches And Keychain!

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If you’ve seen the 2005 French horror movie High Tension, then chances are that you either LOVE it or HATE it – all primarily based on the twist that comes in the end.  It’s a twisty twist and seems to divide most High Tension watchers.  Me myself, I loved it.  And because I loved it, I was pretty stoked to see these promotional items on eBay this week!

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High Tension matches and a keychain!  Not exactly groundbreaking, but still pretty cool nonetheless.  The ‘barbed wire bat’ keychain is symbolic and not for anything to do with Negan from The Walking Dead.  Now, if you are a High Tension fan like me then you might want to head on over to the eBay link HERE and contemplate if you need some matches for anything.  The price ($25) is a tad rich for my blood, but there’s always a chance that the seller will come down with the price.  Now excuse me while I go put on the song ‘New Born‘ by Muse and think about any exes of mine who did me wrong…….

Anticipation Alert: Raw (2017)

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How often do you hear news or see a headline that someone passes out in a movie theater because something onscreen was so intense….so horrifying….so disgusting that they just couldn’t stand it and had to drop to the floor or vomit.  I think the last time I can recall something like this happening was during a screening of the movie Bite.  And if you go back and read my review for Bite, then you’ll realize that the hype surrounding that was all a pile of bullshit.  But yes, hype is hype – and whether you want to believe the hype or not (Chuck D would advise you not to), it can be effective and help a movie strive.

The latest movie to jump onboard the ‘someone passed out in the theater’ train is Raw. It’s a delightful tale about a vegetarian who attends a veterinarian school and is forced into a hazing ritual which puts her onto the road of eating meat.  Let’s check out the Red Band trailer below and discuss:

I can tell you something before we go any further, and that’s that the French have a way of making some truly fucked up horror movies (Inside, High Tension, Martyrs).  So based off of that alone, I’m ready for Raw.  Add to that the fact that director Julia Ducournau seems to have skills behind the camera because the trailer if visually stunning.  Fucked up, but visually stunning.  And also probably one of the most effective trailers I’ve seen in a long time.  This is on the top of my list for 2017 and will be out in the US on March 10th.  I do have a feeling that Raw is going to be an acquired taste though.  That bad cannibal joke is free of charge.

So, About This ‘Martyrs’ Remake…….

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I haven’t went on a good rant in a while.  And what better place to start it back up than with this upcoming remake of the amazing 2008 French horror movie, Martyrs.

I’ll save my breath about Hollywood and the fact that they can’t come up with any original ideas anymore for horror movies, let alone movies in general.  The soon-to-be released Poltergeist remake looks pretty much like a CGI-infused carbon copy of the original.  And don’t get me started on this “exact script as the original” version for the Cabin Fever that’s going to be forced upon us soon.  But none gets my blood boiling more than the upcoming remake of Martyrs, a truly original and mesmerizing horror masterpiece in my opinion that not only punches you in the gut while you watch it, but makes you contemplate something as important and thought provoking as afterlife.  Oh, and it’s got one amazing shotgun blast death scene too.

Tremendous, isn’t it?  If you’ve seen the original Martrys, then I don’t have to tell you it goes to places that most American films don’t have the balls to go to. And therein lies the problem with this remake.  I just don’t have an ounce of faith that it will take you to where the original went and make you feel what the original made you feel in the end.  Martyrs was one of the only horror movies that literally made me sit in silence after I watched it for a good 15 minutes or so.  But who knows….maybe the directing duo of The Goetz Brothers (there are two of them, so maybe that’s an advantage) will prove me wrong and deliver something faithful and honorable to that 2008 version.  At least they’re not overselling it already and calling it ‘The Ultimate Horror Movie‘ or anything like that.

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Fuck……

Anticipation Alert: Among The Living (2014)

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Anyone who asks me to recommend a horror film from the last 10 years will automatically get one of two responses:  Martyrs (2008) or Inside (2007)

Both are French horror movies and both are pretty fucked up in their own right. Also, both are near masterpieces in this writer’s opinion, with Inside probably narrowly edging out Martyrs for being my favorite out of the two.  In 2011, the Inside writer/director team of Alexandre Bustillo and Julien Maury gave us their fresh take on the vampire subgenre with Livide, and now they’re getting back to glorious basics this year with Among The Living:

A lot of things are going on in that trailer, which unfortunately is completely in French, and my interest piqued even more when I saw a clown mask pop up. Among The Living looks like a more demented and fucked up version of Stand By Me, and considering I love that movie as much as I do – it’s not a surprise that I’m completely on board with this one.  Stylistically it looks great and the tension seems to be in full effect, much like it was during Inside. Judging from the fact that Among The Living is already receiving high praise from film festival reviews, this one has made it to the top of my list for this year’s most anticipated horror movies.

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