Ebay Find Of The Week: ‘Texas Chainsaw Massacre’ Shot Glass!

Shots!  Shots!  Shots!  Shots!  Fitting considering it’s Cinco de Mayo and I’m craving tequila.  But anyway, why take a shot out of a boring shot glass that you picked up on your road trip to Nebraska when you can put your lips onto this promotional shot glass from the remake/reboot of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre?!?

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Unfortunately, they weren’t able to coordinate Jessica Biel’s wondrous white tank top into the design of the shot glass, but it’s a shot glass nonetheless.  Some good news is that the seller on eBay has about 10 of these and is accepting offers and is including ‘free shipping’ as well.  So, I’m guessing you could probably snag one for around $5 in total.  If you’re feeling like you need this in your life, then go to the listing HERE and do your business.  Or you can just go to Youtube and look up slow-mo shots of Jessica Biel running around in that white tank top.  Your choice.

Ebay Find Of The Week: ‘The Texas Chainsaw Massacre’ Atari Video Game

I honestly never thought I would be doing a post about an Atari video game that costs $500.  But here we go!  Not just any Atari video game though – but The Texas Chainsaw Massacre Atari video game:

$_57I was actually surprised that the price was so high for this.  Not because it’s an old video game, but because it’s a shitty old video game.  Pretty much the best thing about it is the cover with the Columbo-looking guy hunting down Leatherface and the fact that Leatherface’s chainsaw in the game looks the cross between a faucet and a penis.  Nevermind the $500 price tag, if you are the hardcore horror collector, this is a must to own.  Go check out the listing on Ebay over HERE and make sure to check out some of the awesomely bad footage from the game down below:

Terrible Halloween Mask Of The Week: Leatherface (The Texas Chainsaw Massacre)

I’m really on a hot streak lately with finding some super unnecessarily hairy Halloween masks based on your favorite horror icons.  The other week I found a ‘Larry from The Three Stooges’ inspired rubber monstrosity of Michael Myers that you can see HERE.  And this week, I’ve stroke gold again with what looks to be a Leatherface mask fully equipped with some wild, untamed hair.

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Yeah, that just happened.  Now look – I know that everybody needs to find ways to make a buck and try to survive.  But who in holy hell thought that this was a good idea?  The face work is serviceable, albeit a little over-the-top, but can we talk about the hairy elephant in the room here?  I’m no Leatherface expert and it’s not my place to act like I know what he does in his spare time, but I highly doubt he goes to the hair salon and gets his hair put in curlers.  And that’s what happened here apparently.  Leatherface had a bad hair curler experience and it’s out of control at this point, leaving no hope in sight.  I tried to click the Ebay link to the mask and unfortunately it says there was an error in the listing.  And I believe that error was trying to sell it in the first place.

‘Leatherface: The Acne Years’ Is Coming Soon!

Well, file this one under the ‘What The Fuck’ category.  It was reported yesterday by The Wrap that the newest addition to The Texas Chainsaw Massacre saga is going to focus on Leatherface in his teenage years.  I’ll give that a second to sink in.  What do you think of the news, recently deceased original Texas Chainsaw Massacre star Marilyn Burns?

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Couldn’t have said it better myself.  So yes, it has been confirmed that this is actually happening and it even has a generic uninspired title to go along with the generic uninspired storyline.  It will be called (drum roll please)……..Leatherface!  A lot powerful minds worked on that one.  I won’t apologize for not liking Texas Chainsaw 3D last year.  A couple of good gore scenes aside, it was a train wreck.  And the last thing I ever want to do is sympathize with a deranged killer who wields a chainsaw and likes to wear people’s skin for his masks.  So now we have this news about the prequel to the original 1974 movie where apparently we’ll enter the mind of a teenage Leatherface.

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Since this is going to focus on his teen years, we can now finally see what we’ve always wanted to see when we think of Leatherface.  His acne and that moment where his voice changes.  I’m sure it will be pretty embarrassing for him.  Speaking of which, we might even get to see him get caught by his Mom while masturbating for the first time.  Yikes!  All bad jokes and humor aside, I guess I should wait and hold out a little hope until things get rolling on this prequel.  But I got a funny feeling and a bad taste in my mouth that this isn’t going to go well.  Until the final verdict is in though, I’m dusting off my copy of the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre and am gonna give it a watch to make everything right with the world, at least for the moment.

Holy Armadillos! New Poster For The 40th Anniversary Of ‘The Texas Chainsaw Massacre’ Is Released

Thanks to Entertainment Weekly, we get a glimpse at a new poster to commemorate the 40th Anniversary of Tobe Hooper’s 1974 classic, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  And it’s good news if you’re a fan of armadillos!

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A new remastered version of the iconic horror film will make it’s debut at the SXSW festival this Monday.  But let’s talk about this poster for a minute.  Some might complain that it’s light on chainsaws, but I personally love it though.  It’s got the infamous van with the creepy hitchhiker blood smeared all over it.  And the colors really pop, which is always better than the alternative of the colors not popping.

The poster does bring to light an unfortunate realization that we must all come to terms with though:  The senseless killing of armadillos.  These strange creatures deserve better than to be left on the side of the road on their backs. It really can just start with one kind gesture to your fellow armadillo the next time you see him (or her) while you’re wandering in a waterless desert.  You will be rewarded with good karma.  Ok, now let’s see a pic of the crazy hitchhiker who smeared his blood all over the side of the van!

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