Review: Red Christmas (2017)

You better watch out, you better not cry……you better not pout because there’s a really good Christmas horror movie that you need to watch this year!  I know, I know – it’s Halloween season.  But I had the pleasure of finally sitting down and watching Craig Anderson’s Red Christmas and it indeed got me into the Christmas horror movie spirit!

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Monday Bloody Monday: ‘Topless Wood Chipper Death’ From ‘Silent Night’ (2012)

It’s Christmastime!  Carolers are caroling.  The mistletoe is being hung.  And a topless women is getting thrown into a wood chipper in broad daylight by a psychotic Santa Claus.

Welcome to Monday Bloody Monday, and since it’s the holiday season it feels only right to spotlight a Christmas-themed horror movie.  In 2012, Silent Night was released and was actually a decent little throwback to Silent Night, Deadly Night.  And just like in the latter, Santa is out to punish the naughty.  In this case, the naughty is a topless girl who is about to meet her grisly demise at the merciless hands of a wood chipper.  Grab some egg nog and click the link below:

Random Christmas Horror Movies: P2 (2007)

With Christmas fast approaching, I’ve started gathering up my favorite horror movies to watch around this time of the year.  Black Christmas?  Check! Silent Night, Deadly Night?  Check!  Jack Frost 2: Revenge Of The Mutant Killer Snowmen?  Double check!  But with my old age comes forgetfulness, and I always seem to not remember that the 2007 movie P2 is a Christmas horror movie and might deserve to be in my rotation.

P2 is a delightful tale about a woman named Angela (Rachel Nichols) who is stalked in her parking garage at work by a security guard named Thomas (Wes Bentley).  Fun fact:  Wes Bentley can be seen in the last few seasons of American Horror Story!  So anyway, in the movie it all takes place on Christmas Eve night which is a good indication that this is a Christmas horror movie.  Oh – and Elvis’ ‘Blue Christmas‘ makes an appearance during a stalking scene and that’s a bonus for me because I love that song.

And so the stalking goes on.  And Angela runs around in a low-cut wet shirt, with her two main large assets bouncing around like jingle bells.  Bouncing and bouncing and bouncing……..I’m sorry – what was I talking about?  Oh yeah – the stalking continues and it obviously comes to a predictable cliched climax. But before we can climax, we need to have more bloody fun!  So if you haven’t seen P2 and are deciding whether or not to give it a whirl, check out the clip below with one of the best ‘body smashing with a car’ kills ever.  Merry Christmas, everybody!